Bott-isms

Dr. Bott is the absolutely amazing Chemistry professor I had this semester.  Imagine my surprise when I learned that he could actually teach, and that I could actually understand Chemistry.  And not only that, but he's funny.  And British... with an accent that kinda sounds like the Beatles'.  If the jokes below don't sound funny, say them with a British accent, and you'll more than likely understand why I put them here.

What does a constipated mathematician do? He works it out with a pencil.

"It's a knick knack, Patty Wack, give the frog a loan"

"He was arrested for... carrying an underage gull across sedate lions for immoral porpoises."

"At some stage I may take my top off, that alright with you?"

"And for the constant we use k, because we can't spell."

"Some of you want to suck? Oh, alright then..."

"The neutron is stripping."

"Now I'm going to write for you the most beautiful, the most gorgeous, the most SEXY thing in Chemistry..." (Referring to those "beautiful, sexy reaction lines")

"I initiated eating my breakfast... bollocks!" (This said when referring to the SCE chart, pronounced 'skeh chart')

On acids: "Which will eat through your tongue the fastest?"    "Measure how quickly your tongue will dissolve."

"Aw... did that scare you all." (After half the class screamed at a loud thunderclap.)